The first real guy that I met online was Chris. I was 26, and he was 28. He had recently moved to the East Coast from the West Coast and gotten a job at a University. We started talking on #plentyoffish, the online dating site, and app. We seemed to hit it off, and then he finally asked me to meet him for drinks to watch the Stanley Cup Playoffs at a local sports bar. I was terrified, but excited all at the same time. We met, and he must have been nervous too – and I think drank a lot before I arrived, because throughout the night he had to pee like 6 times.
It was a typical first date, we asked and answered the normal questions, got to know each other. I was excited because my team was winning! It was a great night, and at the end he walked me to my car, and kissed me on the cheek. I was really smitten after that. I went back and talked to my roommates about him, and couldn’t stop smiling.
We kept texting and talking, and then a couple days later, he invited me on another date to go watch the Soccer World Cup. By the time I actually got to the bar, the game was over – but we just stayed and talked to each other. It was a fun date. Our third date we met near his house. He took me to his favorite restaurant – the Olive Garden – and then afterwards we went to his house to watch a movie. Now he lives in an apartment by himself, but he didnt have a couch, so watching a movie meant that we watched in his bedroom on his bed. He was completely a gentleman, he held me – and didn’t try and take advantage of the situation.
We kept seeing each other, I’d go over to his apartment and watch TV after work, then typically drive home at night. Things started getting weird when he sent me a text with the most dreaded words ever – We Need to Talk. Of course, this sent me in a panic – we had been seeing each other for over a month, and I didn’t think anything was wrong. We decided that I should go to his place so we can talk. When I got there – he looked a mess, it was really concerning. The basic jist of why he wanted to talk, was because was different form the other girls that he had dated, and it was weird to him. He said he was comfortable with me, like I was just one of his friends. I didnt really understand how that was bad – but I guess looking back, he didn’t really see me as a romantic partner – just someone to kill time with.
After this, we kept seeing each other, it seemed like everything was fine. One Saturday he invited me over after I finished working as a volunteer at a fesitval. I didn’t get to his house until late, and even went over in stuff that I could sleep in – hoping that this could be the night that he was going to ask me to stay. And he did! We watched movies, and then we ended up fooling around (don’t worry I am not going to make this an X-rated blog or anything with details). We didn’t have sex, but we went farther than we had before.
The next few days were weird. He told me that he was going to spend the night in Baltimore – and then all of a sudden, he went ghost. -side note. Going ghost is the worst! – I took me emailing his work email to find out if he was even still alive. We had gone from talking every day to not talking for almost a week. It was weird. He responded that he was fine, and he broke his phone. It took another week – but he finally text me. Saying that he got the messages I had sent, and I got those dreaded words again – We Need to Talk –
When we talked he told me what was wrong – that he recieved test results that he was HIV positive. Well – let’s just say I had no idea how to handle this. Basically we broke up – because he told me that he was being punsihed by God for having a child out of wedlock (oh yeah, didn’t I mention this – he had a 6 year old son, who was living with his mom on the West Coast).
Well a few months later my roommate and I were stalking him on google – because that’s what you do, you research people on the internet to lear as much as you can about a person. And in doing so, I found – HIS WEDDING REGISTRY!!!!! so I have no idea if his story of HIV was real or not, or if he was just cheating on me and this was the way that wanted to break up with me.